Words I never thought I would actually feel again after the grenade exploded. But there I was day after day greeted by Hope and Joy each morning. An odd and unfamiliar pair considering their rivals (Fear and Sadness) had been the welcoming committee season after season. Yet, there we are all were.
Given it had been so long since we last met, I assumed this was a quick visit and that H&J would be on their way soon enough. But the daily greetings continued and their persistence, while a bit unnerving and refreshing, had broader purpose. They came to disclose some truths I had not seen and to clarify some mysteries...
In my fear when I thought I needed Him to stand in front of me to protect and shield me, He deliberately stood next to me solidifying the courage within.
When I leapt into risk He stood behind me, helping thrust me into greener pastures. Acquiescently following my lead.
When I often became paralyzed by sorrow, He hovered. Never once asking me to get up, move on, or push forward. He gracefully hovered until I was ready to stand.
When life felt like it was being snatched from my grip, He reminded me who actually holds it all.
In my need for practicals, next steps, and formalized plans — He mercifully redirected me from my habitual need to take flight into distraction from the real work necessary.
When self-absorption has led the way, He forgave me and carved out new paths for me to follow.
When I’ve filled up on the opinions of others, He withdraws just enough to stoke my desperation for Him.
He is undoubtedly the most intimate lover I’ve ever taken; yet He never begs for me only gently beckons.